{"id":387,"date":"2025-03-31T09:24:18","date_gmt":"2025-03-31T01:24:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.secondspringph.com\/wordpress\/?p=387"},"modified":"2025-04-03T07:42:38","modified_gmt":"2025-04-02T23:42:38","slug":"the-unexpected-professor-what-i-learned-from-cancer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.secondspringph.com\/index.php\/2025\/03\/31\/the-unexpected-professor-what-i-learned-from-cancer\/","title":{"rendered":"The Unexpected Professor:\u00a0 What I Learned from Cancer"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<!-- Begin Brevo Form -->\n<!-- START - We recommend to place the below code in head tag of your website html  -->\n<style>\n  @font-face {\n    font-display: block;\n    font-family: Roboto;\n    src: url(https:\/\/assets.brevo.com\/font\/Roboto\/Latin\/normal\/normal\/7529907e9eaf8ebb5220c5f9850e3811.woff2) format(\"woff2\"), url(https:\/\/assets.brevo.com\/font\/Roboto\/Latin\/normal\/normal\/25c678feafdc175a70922a116c9be3e7.woff) format(\"woff\")\n  }\n\n  @font-face {\n    font-display: fallback;\n    font-family: Roboto;\n    font-weight: 600;\n    src: url(https:\/\/assets.brevo.com\/font\/Roboto\/Latin\/medium\/normal\/6e9caeeafb1f3491be3e32744bc30440.woff2) format(\"woff2\"), url(https:\/\/assets.brevo.com\/font\/Roboto\/Latin\/medium\/normal\/71501f0d8d5aa95960f6475d5487d4c2.woff) format(\"woff\")\n  }\n\n  @font-face {\n    font-display: fallback;\n    font-family: Roboto;\n    font-weight: 700;\n    src: url(https:\/\/assets.brevo.com\/font\/Roboto\/Latin\/bold\/normal\/3ef7cf158f310cf752d5ad08cd0e7e60.woff2) format(\"woff2\"), url(https:\/\/assets.brevo.com\/font\/Roboto\/Latin\/bold\/normal\/ece3a1d82f18b60bcce0211725c476aa.woff) format(\"woff\")\n  }\n\n  #sib-container input:-ms-input-placeholder {\n    text-align: left;\n    font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif;\n    color: #c0ccda;\n  }\n\n  #sib-container input::placeholder {\n    text-align: left;\n    font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif;\n    color: #c0ccda;\n  }\n\n  #sib-container textarea::placeholder {\n    text-align: left;\n    font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif;\n    color: #c0ccda;\n  }\n\n  #sib-container a {\n    text-decoration: underline;\n    color: #2BB2FC;\n  }\n<\/style>\n<link rel=\"stylesheet\" href=\"https:\/\/sibforms.com\/forms\/end-form\/build\/sib-styles.css\">\n<!--  END - We recommend to place the above code in head tag of your website html -->\n\n<!-- START - We recommend to place the below code where you want the form in your website html  -->\n<div class=\"sib-form\" style=\"text-align: center;\n                 background-image: url(https:\/\/img.mailinblue.com\/8992613\/images\/content_library\/original\/67e9ec5294c374db299f180f.png);           background-size: cover;         background-repeat: no-repeat;         background-position: center center; \">\n  <div id=\"sib-form-container\" class=\"sib-form-container\">\n    <div id=\"error-message\" class=\"sib-form-message-panel\" style=\"font-size:16px; text-align:left; font-family:Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#661d1d; background-color:#ffeded; border-radius:3px; border-color:#ff4949;max-width:540px;\">\n      <div class=\"sib-form-message-panel__text sib-form-message-panel__text--center\">\n        <svg viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" class=\"sib-icon sib-notification__icon\">\n          <path d=\"M256 40c118.621 0 216 96.075 216 216 0 119.291-96.61 216-216 216-119.244 0-216-96.562-216-216 0-119.203 96.602-216 216-216m0-32C119.043 8 8 119.083 8 256c0 136.997 111.043 248 248 248s248-111.003 248-248C504 119.083 392.957 8 256 8zm-11.49 120h22.979c6.823 0 12.274 5.682 11.99 12.5l-7 168c-.268 6.428-5.556 11.5-11.99 11.5h-8.979c-6.433 0-11.722-5.073-11.99-11.5l-7-168c-.283-6.818 5.167-12.5 11.99-12.5zM256 340c-15.464 0-28 12.536-28 28s12.536 28 28 28 28-12.536 28-28-12.536-28-28-28z\" \/>\n        <\/svg>\n        <span class=\"sib-form-message-panel__inner-text\">\n                          Your subscription could not be saved. 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Please review the field format and try again.\";\n\n  window.REQUIRED_ERROR_MESSAGE = \"This field cannot be left blank. \";\n\n  window.GENERIC_INVALID_MESSAGE = \"The information provided is invalid. Please review the field format and try again.\";\n\n\n\n\n  window.translation = {\n    common: {\n      selectedList: '{quantity} list selected',\n      selectedLists: '{quantity} lists selected',\n      selectedOption: '{quantity} selected',\n      selectedOptions: '{quantity} selected',\n    }\n  };\n\n  var AUTOHIDE = Boolean(0);\n<\/script>\n\n<script defer src=\"https:\/\/sibforms.com\/forms\/end-form\/build\/main.js\"><\/script>\n\n\n<!-- END - We recommend to place the above code in footer or bottom of your website html  -->\n<!-- End Brevo Form -->\n\n\n\n<div id=\"thanks-message\" style=\"display:none; background: #f0fff0; border: 1px solid #cfc; padding: 1em; margin-bottom: 1em; font-size: 1.1em; border-radius: 8px;\">\n  \ud83c\udf89 <strong>Thank you for signing up!<\/strong> I&#8217;m glad you&#8217;re here. Watch your inbox for more stories, tools, and wellness tips made for women over 35.\n<\/div>\n<script>\n  const params = new URLSearchParams(window.location.search);\n  if (params.get('thanks') === '1') {\n    document.getElementById('thanks-message').style.display = 'block';\n  }\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n<p>Cancer turned out to be one of my strangest\u2014but best\u2014teachers. It reminded me that time and life are God\u2019s most precious gifts\u2014and that we waste too much of both on things (and people) that don\u2019t deserve them. On our very first session, my psycho-oncologist, Dr. S asked me, <em>\u201cIf cancer doesn\u2019t change you, what does?\u201d<\/em> That question still sits with me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Hardships \u2014whether illness, loss, or career upheaval\u2014shape us. They don\u2019t define us, but they <em>do<\/em> teach us. And the first lesson I\u2019ve learned? <strong><em>Perspective.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Now, when something stresses me out, I ask myself, <em>\u201cIs this as bad as cancer?\u201d<\/em> If the answer is no, then it\u2019s really not that bad at all. That little mental trick has saved me from spiralling over things I used to stress about (and as a genetically programmed worrier, I stress about a lot). But perspective isn\u2019t just for the big, dramatic moments in life\u2014it\u2019s for the everyday ones, too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>An ex-boss who loved framing a career conversation with thought provoking questions asked me if I knew who the biggest killer of Allied soldiers were in World War II.&nbsp; (At this point, I thought this was his own preamble to killing my own career but thankfully, he was just <em>trying<\/em> to show off how smart he was).&nbsp; Humoring him, I was surprised to learn that the biggest killer in the Pacific War wasn\u2019t enemy fire\u2014it was mosquitoes. MOSQUITOES (!) Imagine surviving a war zone only to get taken out by an insect. So now, when I think about my own everyday \u201cmosquitoes\u201d\u2014 slow-moving traffic, misplaced food deliveries or annoying emails\u2014I refuse to let them suck up my energy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The energy I have now no longer matches what my old corporate job required. And that\u2019s okay. When I found attending a quarterly forecast meeting to be more tiring than a chemo session, I knew it was no longer for me.&nbsp; Cancer\u2019s second lesson was to <strong><em>let grace win over guilt<\/em><\/strong>.&nbsp; I needed to be comfortable with this new truth about me. Me who identified as a full-fledged career woman and defined success with a packed calendar, frequent business travel and validating C-suite feedback.&nbsp; The truth will set you free\u2026 but first, it\u2019s going to punch you in the face.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Aside from the gifts of perspective and self-grace, my extraordinary teacher also taught me something else. I developed what my husband called <strong><em>cancer courage<\/em><\/strong>\u2014the audacity to do things I wouldn\u2019t have dared before and a sharp vigilance against anything that wastes my time or energy. I no longer feel the need to apologize for what I\u2019ve done or ask permission for what I want to do. I embraced a survivor mindset, not a victim mentality. Because once you stop seeing yourself as powerless, you start making decisions that actually honor who you are and where you want to go.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But you obviously don\u2019t need to get sick to have a different kind of courage. I once read that courage is like a muscle\u2014you strengthen it with use. Mine got quite the workout&#8230; without the buff personal trainer that would at least be easy on the eyes. And like any good workout, it only gets better with consistency and practice\u2026 every day.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>On our last therapy session, Dr. S reminded me that there&#8217;s a big difference between <em>non-doing<\/em> and <em>doing nothing,<\/em> and I&#8217;ve also since learned to embrace stillness without guilt. That instead of being done by experiences, we need to allow for the experiences to move through us.&nbsp; Those words took me time to distill until I realized that courage isn\u2019t just about \u201chaving a go\u201d but also in \u201cletting go\u201d.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We all face challenges\u2014some life-altering, others seemingly small but still significant. Life isn\u2019t about clinging to who we were, but embracing who we\u2019re becoming. At the end of the day, life is too precious to live unchanged. The real question isn\u2019t whether challenges will shape you\u2014it\u2019s whether you\u2019ll have the courage to let them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Your subscription could not be saved. Please try again. Your subscription has been successful. 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